You want your children to be happy and successful, but there's only so much you can do. It takes a lot of luck to raise children who will live successful lives. Aside from loving them and keeping them fed and clothed, you probably won't know what your children are capable of until they've grown adults — with careers and children of their own.
Raising children is definitely one of the most difficult and rewarding tasks in the world — and one for which you may feel unprepared.
Here are nine healthy parenting tips to help you feel more fulfilled as a parent.
1. Increasing your child's self-confidence
When children experience themselves via their parents' eyes, they begin to establish a sense of self.
Your children pick up on your tone of voice, body language, and facial expressions. More than anything else, your words and actions as a parent have an impact on their developing self-esteem.
Praise accomplishments, no matter how minor, and letting children do things on their own will make them feel powerful and strong.
Belittling remarks or unfair comparisons of one youngster to another, on the other hand, will make children feel worthless.
Make sure you're not making any loaded statements or using words as a weapon. Comments such as "What a stupid thing to do!" or "You act more like a baby than your small brother!" can be just as damaging as physical strikes.
Be empathetic and choose your words carefully. Tell your children that everyone makes mistakes and that you still love them despite their bad behavior.
2. Recognize good behavior in children
Have you ever considered how many times you react badly to your children in a single day?
It's possible that you'll find yourself criticizing significantly more than complimenting. Even if it was well-intentioned, how would you feel about a manager who gave you so much harsh advice?
Catching youngsters doing something well is a more successful strategy.
"You made your bed without being asked - that's fantastic!" you may say. or "I was watching you play with your sister and I noticed how patient you were."
Over time, these words will do more to encourage good behavior than continuous reprimands.
Every day, make it a point to find something to be grateful for. Be generous with your incentives - your love, hugs, and congratulations may go a long way and are frequently sufficient compensation.
You'll soon see that you're "developing" more of the behavior you want to see.
3. Dedicate time to your children
It's not always easy for parents and children to sit down for a family meal, let alone spend quality time together. However, there is probably nothing that children would enjoy more.
Get up 10 minutes earlier in the morning to eat breakfast with your child, or leave the dishes in the sink after supper and go on a walk. When children do not receive the attention they desire from their parents, they often act out or misbehave in order to be noticed.
Many parents find it rewarding to schedule time with their children together. Each week, set aside a "special night" for your family to spend time together, and let your children help you pick how to spend it.
Look for alternative ways to interact with your children, such as leaving a letter or something special in their lunchbox.
Adolescents appear to require less of their parents' undivided attention than younger children. Because there are fewer opportunities for parents and teens to interact, parents should make every effort to be there when their teen expresses an interest in talking or participating in family activities.
Attending concerts, games, and other events with your teen shows that you care about him or her and allows you to learn more about him or her and his or her pals.
If you're a working parent, don't feel bad about it. Kids will remember the many small things you do, such as preparing popcorn, playing games, and window shopping.
4. Be a good role model for others
By seeing their parents, young children can learn a lot about how to act. The younger they are, the more they will pick up on your cues.
Consider this before you lash out or lose your cool in front of your child: Is this how you want your child to act when he or she is angry?
Be mindful that your children are continuously watching you. Children who tend to hit have a role model for aggressiveness at home, according to studies.
Respect, friendliness, honesty, kindness, and tolerance are all traits you want to instill in your children. Demonstrate selflessness. Do things for others without expecting anything in return. Thank you and provide praises.
Above all, treat your children as you would want others to treat you.
5. Be consistent in your discipline and set limits
Discipline is essential in any household. Discipline is intended to assist children in selecting appropriate behavior and developing self-control. They may test the boundaries you set for them, but they require those boundaries in order to mature into responsible people.
Establishing house rules assists children in understanding and developing self-control.
No TV until homework is completed, and no hitting, name-calling, or nasty teasing are permitted.
You may want to implement a system that includes a single warning, followed by repercussions such as a "time out" or the loss of privileges.
Failure to follow through with the consequences is a common blunder made by parents. You can't punish children for speaking up one day and then ignoring them the next. Consistency teaches what you want to learn.
6. Prioritize communication
You can't expect your children to accomplish everything just because you say so. They, like adults, demand and deserve explanations. If we don't take the time to explain our values and motivations, children will begin to question whether they are valid.
Reasoning with children allows them to understand and learn in a nonjudgmental manner.
Make it clear what you expect. If a problem exists, describe it, share your feelings, and invite your child to help you find a solution. Consequences must be included.
Make recommendations and provide options. Also, be receptive to your child's suggestions. Negotiate. Children who are involved in the making of decisions are more likely to carry them out.
7. Be willing to change your parenting style if necessary
If you frequently feel "betrayed" by your child's actions, you may have unreasonable expectations. Parents who believe in "shoulds" may find it beneficial to do some research or speak with other parents or child development specialists.
"My child should be potty-trained by now," for example.
Because children's environments influence their behavior, you may be able to alter their behavior by altering the environment.
If you find yourself saying "no" to your 2-year-old all the time, consider changing your environment so that fewer things are off-limits. Both of you will be less frustrated as a result of this.
As your child grows older, you'll need to adjust your parenting style. It's likely that what works now with your child will no longer work in a year or two.
Teens are more likely to seek their peers as role models than their parents. However, while enabling your teen to gain more independence, continue to provide advice, encouragement, and necessary discipline. And make the most of every opportunity to connect!
8. Demonstrate your unconditional love
You have the responsibility of correcting and guiding your children as a parent. However, how you deliver corrective feedback makes a huge impact on how a youngster responds to it.
Avoid scolding, condemning, or finding fault with your child while confronting them, since this will lower their self-esteem and lead to resentment. Instead, even when disciplining your children, attempt to nourish and encourage them.
Make sure they understand that, while you hope for and expect more the next time, your love will always be there for them.
9. Be aware of your own needs and limitations
Recognize that you are a flawed parent. As a family leader, you have both strengths and shortcomings. Recognize your strengths – "I am devoted and loving."
Make a promise to work on your flaws – "I need to be more disciplined." Try to set reasonable goals for yourself, your spouse, and your children. You don't have to know everything; be patient with yourself.
Also, make parenting a manageable task. Rather than attempting to cover everything at once, concentrate on the areas that require the most attention. When you're exhausted, admit it.
Take a break from parenting to do things that will make you feel good about yourself (or as a couple).
Putting your needs first does not make you a selfish person. It simply shows that you are concerned about your personal well-being, another crucial value to instill in your children.
While parenting is not something we can plan for, having some helpful ideas and tactics on hand can help. The healthy parenting tips listed above are just a few tried-and-true methods for raising your children the way you want.
We hope these tips will help you better understand the basics of raising a child. These tips aren't meant to be comprehensive or all-inclusive, but we think it's a good start.
If you were to follow just one of our pieces of advice, what would it be? We'd love to hear!